Episode #67 Sean Stephenson Part 2
Sean Stephenson stops by to discuss overcoming obstacles and developing strong inner game.
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How to Game a Waitress
They are usually very cute and attractive. They get approached a lot and they are used to men that
try to flirt with them. Waitresses.
But as we have all seen Star Wars 4 and we all have heard Yoda say: “No! Try not. Do, or do not.
There is no try.” We do not try to flirt with them, we do the real deal.
Once you understand one thing it is actually pretty easy to do that. Sure she is hired to be nice to
you, but still it is easy. One shift in your head makes all the difference.
You have to see her as a person. When you approach her you probably think of her as a waitress that
gets approached 30 times a day – and guess what… all the other 30 guys do that too. You have to be
different in order to get a different result.
So in order to communicate with the person you have to say something personal to her. She follows
a routine, a system. Walking to the table, take the order, smile, bring the food over to the table, get
the check, receive money, next. She does it all day long. Again and again.
Now if you break that pattern she will remember you. I usually break it by asking for her favorite
cocktail, what she prefers with this and that dish or what are her three favorite things on the menu.
A personal opinion breaks her routine. If she is bored then ask her how long she has been working
today. If you are friendly she usually will tell you. Then talk about her day or connect on what she
said. You can play with her a bit and be cocky or slightly sexual. This will make you different than the
other guys. Always be charming – never rude. She is the person that brings you the, hopefully clean,
food!
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Open Forum Discussion: How To Seduce Difficult Women with Richard Temchine Part 1
Pickup Podcast presents, Richard Temtchine in an open forum discussion from the heart of NYC, featuring the major motion picture How To Seduce Difficult Women.
Before the Game…before players, pimps, and pickup artists, where was the art of seduction truly born?
How to Seduce Difficult Women is about bringing American men back full circle to the roots of seduction, forged tirelessly throughout the centuries in France.
Throughout the film, we get to witness a motley crew of clueless hopefuls get spoon fed the wit and wisdom that it takes to seduce difficult women, led by their womanizing French teacher, Philippe.
Through Philippe’s seduction course and How-To-manual, he drops the skills to help this eclectic group of guys to find out how to capture the woman…or rather mate…of their dreams. However throughout this school, we get to see if the master womanizer himself has the ability to keep his game tight or if he is the one that really needs schooling. Along the way we also get a taste of real-life NYC street interviews on romance, sex and seduction to see how it all stacks up in real life.
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How to Trigger Attraction in Women: Part 1
By now you may have realized that if a woman isn’t attracted or interested, “ain’t nothin’ happenin’”.
All that matters is her level of interest and attraction and if you ‘force’ things, it’s not going to work. The key is to get her attracted and interested without really trying and to develop that ‘ability’ to reach through to women
beyond your personality or social status.
So how can you let a rose bloom in the desert? How can you break through the force field walls of her defenses or get her heart skipping when you’re near?
You can’t really talk her into it if she’s not feeling that chemistry or ’spark’ of attraction. I’ll talk here less about the physiological process and more about how you can develop the ability to trigger attraction response.
The thing is, until you really get your game down, most Pradas and Prickteases not only are working against you, they’re working against themselves and dozens of great catch men because of their socially conditioned behavior. You have to release this B.S. burden off of your shoulders and you will when you understand the natural behavior of women is nothing close.
If you’re an average guy going up against independent and social alpha women, it’s going to be a bad training ground for attraction in the first place.
One way to trigger attraction is to emulate the behavior of crass, outlaw bad boys or jerks. Unfortunately there are women who have built up a fake shell (that becomes behavioral) that men and many PUA’s promote throwing the rug out from under her; breaking her down or ‘negging’ her.
That’s one way to deal with it… but it’s unnatural and manipulative. It does often seem to be the only thing that will get through to many of these women in certain environments (who I have seen only end up ‘cockblocking’ themselves from ever getting any action).
To me, it’s sad that the behavior of some women would come down to this but I understand where the root of this social behavior comes from so I feel some empathy for them on that level.
Men and women are lonelier than ever because they’ve lost touch with their inherent nature.
Nature is your key to just about everything you desire and it’s your path to triggering attraction. It’s your relationship with female nature instead of their social behavior or personal development that matters most in seduction.
And until you understand your relationship to female social, inner and natural behavior, it’s going to be a tough and blinding road out there I would predict.
Creating Your Seduction Strategy: Part II
Dear Pickup Podcast readers,
In part one of this series, I made a distinction between seduction tactics-the actions and behaviors you do in the field to get women-and strategy. I defined strategy as how you organize your resources to make sure your tactics get executed in a consistent way for maximum success.
How much do you need strategy to make your tactics work?
That depends on one factor and one factor only: how big the gap is between where you are now and where you would like to be.
If you’ve already done pretty well with women, then probably you already instinctively have a good strategy anyway, and you are just looking to polish up a few skills or add in a few new ones.
But in an area of life that has been deeply frustrating, deeply confusing, and loaded with limiting responses, beliefs and emotion….
…..Strategy Becomes Crucial!
Why is this the case?
Well, first of all, when you go to make changes in an area of life that has a lot of emotional charge and very little satisfaction, I can guarantee you 100% that the old patterns of thinking, feeling and acting are going to come up.
Not because you are a self-sabotager or because you are “afraid of success”.
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Why Not Ask HER What She Likes In Bed?
To begin with… this isn’t the worst idea in the world.
Many women like the idea of a man who is confident enough to just say, hopefully AFTER you’ve made love a few times first so that it’s not completely weird, “I want to understand your sexuality better, tell me what kinds of things turn you on and how I can be a better lover for you.”
Just saying something like that displays great confidence and an unselfish desire to please her that no woman is going to be anything less than thrilled about.
It’s the kind of thing she will tell her friends and they will say, “Wow! I wish MY boyfriend was cool like that!”
And yet…
It’s also something that, whether consciously or on an unconscious level, the majority of women are going to find frustrating and disappointing.
She may say something like, “I don’t know… I just like what you are doing.” Or she may give you a good answer about something that she likes…
But part of her will feel robbed of the magic of spontaneity… and, on a more subtle, but possibly even more powerful level, she will feel the loss of some of the sexual tension between you… the loss of some of your masculine power over her.
In many aspects of relationships, women like to be your equal. In some areas, particularly those that are considered part of the feminine domain like decorating the home, she will want to be the boss… but in the area of sexuality in particular, MOST women will favor more traditional sex roles. They will prefer a man who confidently leads.
Of course, that opens a problem: What if the things you are doing are not the things she likes? What if you are disappointing her by not asking her what she likes because she wants something totally different in a lover than what you are naturally giving her?
I have said many times that a woman loves a man who already knows what he’s doing and LEADS her there with a firm but gentle hand.
But I’ve also said many times that all women are different and what works on one will definitely not work on all…
Am I contradicting myself?
Probably. But love-making is an endlessly complex (and endlessly interesting) topic, and it is filled with contradiction and counter-intuitive ideas.
Like I said in the beginning, if she doesn’t mind being asked what turns her on, (or even appreciates it) there is nothing wrong with it. Every woman is different, after all.
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Pump and Dump
So, you’re dating a woman now whose only sexual experiences have been with men that are pump and dumpers. For those of you who don’t know what a pump and dumper is: it’s what I call ‘minutemen.’
Not the minutemen from the Revolutionary War. They get in, they thrust their hips, they pump a few times, and then they dump all their little men: all their little sea-men to swim all over the place.
A lot of women who are young (and some unfortunately that are older) have only been with pump and dumpers and they have no idea of how unbelievably amazing sex can be with an attentive, sexually aware man. They don’t know sex with a man that has been reading these blogs - a man that really knows that sex and foreplay start right inside a woman’s mind.
So let’s say you’ve done it all right. You’ve started with sex and foreplay, and you’ve seduced her mind and you have her all turned on. How do you encourage this woman – who is basically very submissive in bed due to the fact that all of her experience is with Mr. Pump and Dump?
The reason why she is submissive, much of the time, is that she has never explored her own sexuality. A lot of women that have had pump and dumpers don’t know what they want sexually, and they are usually women that have never masturbated. They don’t know what feels good and what doesn’t. Their only experience is with Mr. P & D.
For those of you who think he is related to P & G, you’re absolutely incorrect. Pump and Dump is not Proctor & Gamble - though I heard that Proctor & Gamble makes their products for pump and dumpers. But it’s just a rumor that I heard!
Anyway, how do you encourage this woman to open up to her own sexuality?
First of all, this woman may or may not have ever had an orgasm before. I would assume that she never has. She thinks she might be having an orgasm – it might be a momentary wave – but she is not having a full-blown orgasm.
If you ask her if she’s had an orgasm, and she says, “I think so” – there is no “I think so” when it comes down to orgasms. Either you’ve had one or you haven’t! If a woman will tell you that she thinks she had an orgasm, it means that she has probably only experienced a little wave of pleasure and not a full orgasmic experience. Ladies, please chime in here and describe what a full orgasmic experience feels like so all the men know.
So let’s assume that she’s never had an orgasm. You’ve got to become the teacher in this relationship. She is probably the type of woman that just expects you to do whatever you want to do, and she’ll just lie there submissively.
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Episode #66 Sean Stephenson Part 1
Sean Stephenson stops by to discuss overcoming obstacles and developing strong inner game.
Check out Hookah Paradise Don’t forget to use coupon code ‘pickuppodcast’ to save 10%!
Talking About Television
Television is easily one of the things that I love the most. However, I’m not just one of those people who blindly turns on the “boob tube” just for background noise—I get really involved in the shows that I watch and love to discuss them with friends. This is kind of a generalization, but just like women have different conversational styles generally, they also have different ways of talking about television.
This means that if you can adapt your conversational style, then talking about television can become a great addition to your pickup material. This adaptation involves the types of shows you watch and the ways you talk about them.
I know there are guys out there who will say that it is kind of beta to cater to her interests and conversational style in this way. However, I would like to argue that if you’re familiar with some of the shows that I list here, then you can bring them up first and dominate/lead the conversation, both of which make for perfect opportunities to demonstrate your alpha status.
Here, I’ll cover three types of shows commonly watched by women: Drama, Reality TV, and Talent TV.
Type of Show: Drama
Although the drama genre has recently widened to include the dramady (drama + comedy, think Desperate Housewives and Boston Legal), drama is one of the most popular genres of television women watch. The key feature of dramas is that they usually feature long story arcs over multiple episodes or even a whole season. Some of the more popular dramas (at least among women) that are currently making new episodes include:
• Grey’s Anatomy—Traditional drama following the lives of doctors.
• Lost—A supernatural suspense about people trapped on a mysterious island.
• House, M.D.—Another traditional drama following the lives of doctors.
• Desperate Housewives—Dramady and mystery/suspense show following “typical” suburban families.
In order to incorporate discussion of dramas into your pickup, then you need to have a sense of the overall arc of a season and who the various characters are (typically you can refer to either the character’s name or the actor’s name, whichever you remember). Be prepared to speculate on character motives for taking/not taking particular actions as well as what may/should happen in future episodes.
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